Michty Mia! Student Show 2016 Lyrics

Over the past week, the 95th Aberdeen Student Show, Michty Mia!, was performed six times in Aberdeen’s His Majesty’s Theatre to around 7,000 people. After being involved in various productions of the local musical in the past, I was chuffed to be asked to write a couple of parody songs in Doric for this Aberdonian take on Mamma Mia!

Design: Alasdair Corbett, Studio Four

Design: Alasdair Corbett, Studio Four

Now that the final curtain has come down, I thought it’d be great to share the lyrics I wrote for this all-round brilliant production which saw over 40 students give over a month of their time to raise tens of thousands of pounds for Aberdeen Students’ Charities Campaign. The first is a mash-up parody of Abba’s ‘Thank You for the Music’ and ‘Gimme Gimme Gimme’ and the second is a parody of Megan Trainor’s ‘All About That Bass’. Enjoy!

 

Mannies, Mannies, Mannies / What’s Been Missing

 

Bridgette begins reading Reeva’s diary as the intro plays.

Bridgette (‘Thank You For the Music’):

Bidin’ in Stonie, at times, is a bit o a bore,

fan mam faas asleep, I aften just sneak oot the door.

Fan I feel this lonely, I ken fit to dee:

heid through to the Deen for some male company,

 ‘cos fan I feel forlorn

I’ve an affa bad case o the horn...

Reeva (to ‘Gimme Gimme Gimme’ chorus, while Bridgette reads with increasing shock; Reeva dances back and forth between all three dads):

CHORUS

Mannies mannies mannies, fit een am I aifter?

There’s nae much to choose fae doon at Estaminet.

Mannies mannies mannies, fit een am I aifter?

Guess he’ll hae to dee, I hivna gotten aa day!

(Reeva and one dad – Al – end up under a spotlight)

Half past ten!

He’s a bit o a mover – really kens hoo to sway,

oh I’ll hae me some Italian ony day.

We decide

to sneak into the lavvies, canna wait to see the sights

that are hidden underneath his tighty-whites.

(Reeva looks shocked and moves away from Al)

But this Italian stud,

his salami was a dud!

(She moves on to dance with the two remaining dads; chooses Glen by the verse)

(CHORUS)

Half past twelve

Am I weering beer goggles? ‘Cos he looks like Richard Gere…

Hiy! Ere’s nae “Pretty Woman” gan on here!

S’pose he’ll dee

‘cos I’m fed up o ess place, oh ma feet are getting sare

and I’d hate for half his bed to end up bare!

(Reeva looks disgusted and moves away from Glen)

But his breath was pretty foul –

I’m back oot on the prowl!

(dancing with the final dad, Broch)

(CHORUS)

Half past two

And we’re baith doon the Boolie, hae-in a pull in his car,

he reclines the driver’s seat back affa faaaaar!

Beeped his horn

fan I climbed owre to his side – oh, I wisna very slick

‘cos I ended up entwined wie the gear stick…

(Reeva waddles away from Broch and sings to audience)

He was an aarite ride,

but I’m never satisfied!

 

Mannies mannies mannies, fit een am I aifter?

There’s nae much to choose fae doon at Estaminet.

Mannies mannies mannies, fit een am I aifter?

Ony loon’ll dee fan Reeva Don’s oot to play!

...

Bridgette (Music back to ‘Thank You for the Music’):

Mum’s never mentioned these men when I’ve asked Who or What?

But Grannie has hinted, that mum used to be a right… nut!

Oh, I’ve always wondered, who my dad could be?

Had zero suspects, but now I have three!

The thoughts making me smile

of my dad walking me down the aisle!

Oh my God!

This is what’s been missing, why I’ve been dreading

turning up to my own bloody wedding!

Why be down about it? Why should I stress out my bae

on our big day?

Oh now I’ve stumbled on this puzzle piece,

I can see this has what’s been missing

to make me feel complete.

 

Aa Aboot the Deals

 

Grannie (backing singers in brackets):

CHORUS

Because you ken I’m aa aboot the deals!

Love a steal!

(Home Bargains!)

An Asda Smart Price meal

maks ma feel!

(Pound Stretcher!)

Thon Tesco Finest chiels

are unreal!

(T K Maxx!)

I’m aa aboot the deals –

Boots meal deal…

(deal, deal, deal)

 

Noo you listen here: way back in sixty-two

Fan I got mairried (mairried), wisna that big a do

We both said ‘I do’ doon at the registrar

Then dooned a few pints, doon at The Grill Bar (Far?!)

 

The kinda money folk will shell oot nooadays,

enough to mak ye boke! There must be other ways…

If I was Bridgette (Bridgette), I’d just elope!

Hoo can these brides be bothered? I would never bloody cope…

 

Oh, my mither, she telt ma “Da buy an expensive dress”

(No, nit-nit, no-no nit-nit)

‘Cos my wedding was shotgun and I was a big fat mess!

 (That belly belly! Urgh! That belly belly!)

Ye ken there’s nae better fit for an ever-expanding whale

than a frock made fae fresh bedsheets oot o the Markies’ sale.

 

(CHORUS)

 

Oh my daughter, I telt her to set up a B and B,

(Aye, aye-aye, oh aye, aye-aye)

to hae somewye to bide far I ay get breakfast for free.

(That bed and breakfast! Ooh! That bed and breakfast!)

And noo I’ve convinced oor Bridgette to wed at the bowling club

So I get member’s discoont on aa my ain drink and grub!

 

Because you ken I’m aa aboot the deals –

love a steal!

(Home Bargains!)

An Asda Smart Price meal

maks ma feel!

(Pound Stretcher!)

Thon Tesco Finest chiels

are unreal!

(T K Maxx!)

I’m aa aboot the deals –

Boots meal deal…